Brushes with Greatness….

I am not going to lie. I am a superficial celebrity watcher and obsessed with celebrities. If you were looking for a spiritual or meaningful blog you might want to look elsewhere.

 

I recently saw Morgan Fairchild on a t.v. show and I had a flashback to when I worked at the Cincinnati Zoo. She came to the zoo on a promotional tour for Purina Cat Food. I was an intern and had the job of helping to shepherd around the Zoo in a golf cart.  This was in the early 90’s and Morgan was not as relevant as she was in the 80’s.  The first thing she said to me after she got on the cart was that, “you needed to keep the children away from me.”  I wasn’t sure if this was a court ordered thing or if she didn’t like the wee ones it ultimately didn’t matter because no one knew who she was.  She was okay and traveled with her Italian “hairstylist” who said such crazy things like, “The stress doesn’t show on your hair.” Not kidding at all. It was fascinating to watch her face because even at that time you could bounce a quarter off of it.  From the looks of it the other night she has had even more work done if that is humanly possible. When we drove her back to her limo we kept hitting the bumps and she would squeal. She was talking non-stop about her QVC line.

I also had the privilege of standing next to Joey Buttafuco at a Concierge Desk in Orange County. He came in wearing snake skinned boots. I recognized that smug face anywhere and when he stood next to me I kept coughing in my hand “pervert.” I had to physically stop myself from saying to him in my Amy Fisher Long Island voice, “Joey when you coming overrr!!!” I also wanted to desperately ask him if he liked the Drew Barrymore t.v. movie with one of the Baldwin brothers that isn’t Alec playing him.

At Fox, I had the opportunity to meet several legit celebrities. Randy Jackson called me Dawg and let me grill him about the girl (name escapes me) who got voted off the night before. He looks so tiny in real life. Davy Jones wished me a happy 40^th birthday but wouldn’t say “Flip side” to me when I asked him too. His 22 year old wife kept staring me fearful that I would take away her cash cow. Candace Cameron was very unfriendly and didn’t like it at all when I kept calling her DJ Tanner and her publicist asked me not to call her that.  I met her at a time when we watched an hour of “Full House” a day on DVR.  I took it personally and told her that there were a lot of worse things to be known for.  I am pretty sure her security team has my picture as a person of danger. I banned “Full House” from our home that day and just for good measure put a squash on any recordings of “Growing Pains” because her brother starred in it.

The best brush came when Natasha Bedingfield came to FOX one morning. I had her album and loved the song “Unwritten” so much that I had it as my ringtone.  When she came in, my Dad called me on his phone so she could hear the song. She grabbed my hands and danced with me. She was a good sport and even let me ramble on for about 20 minutes about how “Unwritten” inspired me to lose weight and look at life in a different way. I vaguely remember getting teary and her comforting me. She got me two tickets to her show that night at Bogart’s and asked her manager “if he had tickets for her new friend.”  She then had me program the song “Unwritten” into her assistant’s phone so she could have it as her ringtone. It was an awesome experience.  I am not sure if this next one qualifies as a brush but celebrity stylist to the star “Ricci DeMartino” came to Fox to do a Mommy makeover segment. They needed a Mom to make over and of course my face came to mind. Ricci at the time was doing Patricia Heaton’s clothes for some sitcom she was on FOX.  I was so pumped to do it until I saw the clothes. They dressed me in Dockers (they were sponsoring DeMartino’s tour) that were basically hideous.  But sweet Ricci put me in Patrica’s Heaton’s personal TOD boots. Apparently we wear the same size.  It was magical to be Debra Barone for one brief minute. He asked me not to tell anyone that I did that. Since that was back in 2007, I am going to assume that the statue of limitations has passed.

Thanks for reading and if you have time make a comment. It is freaking me out that only my Atlanta possee has commented. It makes me think that only people outside the tri-state area can comment.